Weird Kid on the Block

So, there I am, outside singing my prayers at 5am this morning - a practise that I have - (the singing and the prayers not the 5am) and clarity, just like the sun (poetic lisence because the sun was nowhere to be seen at 5am) begins to dawn. I realise that it's not enough to admit to being the weird kid on the block when asked, I have to tell people I am the weird kid on the block. This is not happy thought for me... you mean I have to risk being ostracized for good? Sure, says the voice singing back to me, because in actuality, introducing yourself to life and those in it as who you really are is the way to be included. The fear of being ostracized that leads you to hide your true self IS ostracizing you, is fostering the feeling of not being included. Hmmm... a Divine and risky paradox. I sigh. OK - so does that mean more blog? Well sure, that would be one way to admit to being who you are...

It appears then that I am to tell you all about my continuing work with essences and vibration. I'm not sure that I have enough time to bring you right up to date or record everything that has happened this past year but I guess I could give you snap shots? I will therefore endeavour to write regularly over the next few days. (Who knows, if I say it *out loud* it may happen.)

For today (as my son is now awake and says he needs to watch Stevie Nicks on youtube... well he is 3.5 and seems to know his own mind! - In truth I have lost my train of thought.):

It occurred to me, in light of my difficulty with heroic traditions of therapy and healing, that plant and nature essences do not work to treat the symptom of say, perfectionism, directly, they do not remove the need to fold underwear in neat triangles or iron shoelaces, this relationship with order and design is well established and probably at a mechanistic level (though I would have to put more time and thought into this - and I have niether right now) cannot be tinkered with, 'turned down' as it were. Rather the essences work to foster our relationship to the opposite which is what in this case? Chaos or spontaneity perhaps, and this is where the healing lies, in introducing us to the sacredness of disorder and randomness and holding our fears as we get acquainted. We have then a relationship to order and chaos which is more healing and whole than trying to have a relationship to order only. And more spacious too, how much more can exist in the 'distance' between these two things; the subtleties and permutations are infinite - just like the possible numbers between 1 and 2.

I think this work goes on, and has been going on, with our use of vibrational essences, it is not something I have now created that wasn't there before, but seeing it and understanding it is healing too. Part of the human malady is this desire we have to be all one thing, all the *good* things; to purify and be permanently pure. The heroic traditions can exacerbate this desire with the purging and cleansing and releasing...terminology, but not I think, reality (or the underlying 'mechanism'). So to view the use of essences as a way to allow all of me to exist, all parts and pieces to be given space and be included, is gentle and peaceful and probably more close to the truth of how we heal.